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Thursday, June 19, 2008

Champagne Taste on a Beer Budget Cousin

My original post was suppose to be called "Six Degrees of Hoe Separation," but do to an emergency venting posted needed. I will have to save that for next time. It was going to be on an update about my current sex life, and my unsuccessful attempt to remain abstinent for a little while.

Last night I blogged a little, I made a few comments here and there, and then I wrote my next post. I got tired before I finished, and decide to get to it this morning. Last night though, after I got offline, I decided to read a little mail, while I watch T.V. Most of it was credit card applications, one however, was my Visa credit card bill. I actually got it Saturday or Monday...can't really remember, but I didn't open it. I know when my payments are usually going to be, they always fall on the first 6 or 7 days, of the next month of receiving the bill. Do to this, I don't see a need to rush to open it up. I know some people open their bills as soon as they get it...i.e. my mother.

So I casually open it, and what I see, I can't believe my eyes. I recheck to see if, it's really my bill, and it hits me, that I saw my name on the first page bill, that faces out the envelope. On the first page in big bold letters, at the top, I see the words, that just has the air ripped right out of me....Current New Balance $4339.07 dollars!

Sitting there shocked and stunned, I keep telling myself, that this can't be true. My last bill was only $1200 Dollars, how in the world did it jump over $3000 more dollars. Then I realize, the one of the biggest mistake, that I have ever made, I lent my credit card, to my cousin!

Around the last week on May...I believe it was Memorial day weekend....well anyway, he told me, that he had some money, but he wanted to know if he could borrow one of my credit cards, because he was taking his girlfriend out, for the night, because she had been going through some rough depression, and it was a day, she wanted to get out of the house, and have a little much need fun, out on the town. Now I did know that she had been going through some things, and had a little depression going on. So I reluctantly agreed, as long, as he didn't put to much money on it, and he kept tract of what he spent. After that weekend, I kept mentioning my credit card to him, and his response was always, he didn't have it. He leaves it at home, so he wouldn't be tempted to use it.

Unfortunately, he was a failure at this attempt. I mean this bill dates state, that in less than 20 days, he managed to put $3,000. To me this is crazy. Unless your last name is Hilton, Richie, or Olsen, I don't see how you can run up a credit card like this. Now my cousin , is your typical, champagne taste, but now on beer budget. He is literally the guy who drives a Mercedes, but doesn't have gas to put in it...he is the guy, who buys expensive suits and shoes, but literally doesn't have the money to get all of the dry clean only clothes out of the cleaners. Loves to be a big show. He does okay business wise, but is always crying broke. Now I know why.

So, my shocked and stunned,moves to anger real quick, its about 11 at night, but I start calling his phone like crazy.My voice was actually horse today, because of all the screaming, I was doing. He never picked up, because at 10 his ass is knocked out in bed.

I just kept reading all the different charges. P.F Changs...$80 .... Cheesecake Factory $50...ABC store $70...Fridays $80...Fridays 60....Fridays...%75... I mean this nigga stayed up in some Fridays...BK music $65.... O'Charleys $85...Blockbuster...$30...I mean how many movies did you rent. The list is endless. Gas and food, and a through in of a little entertainment. I mean you can tell his whole day, buy the places he went...Like $10 at a Diner...Breakfast, Friday's $60 at Fridays for lunch...the same day $85 at Outback. Multiple days like that. the few times he went to a McDonald's or KFC, it would be a bill like $11 and $22 at fast food places....When I told my mom, she said, well he sure wasn't eating off the value menu.

I think that's the big thing for me. I would still be angry, but I think I could understand, if it was things he needed. Not one time did I see a large purchase at the super market, just image the groceries he could have bought, with one day of all the restaurant money. Not once did I see a water bill or gas bill payment... The only bill he paid, was his cell phone bill...yes this nigga had me paying $80 for his Intelos bill. The thing is during this whole credit card fiasco, he borrowed cash from me. He running up my credit card, but borrowed money for his electric bill.

I finally got him on the phone at 9 this morning...figuring the shit has finally hit the fan. He had the whole thing about he was getting a paycheck advance, from his boss, for a thousand... and on his next paycheck on the 30th, he would have another $1500 for me. This is probably all true, but I can't help but wonder, then what...what about your rent, and your other bills, that I'm already helping you out every now and then. I asked him point blank, how much more has he put on it, since the last date that was on the bill, he said that was the last date. Not another dime since.

I called the Visa company, afterwards, and the automatic system, said that my current balance, was over $5000 dollars. The strength in my knees just left. I just sat in the chair, and I started to cry. I know what some people may say, because of that, but I did. I know some people have diffeent views as to whether a man should cry or not, butI did..I guess I'm not a real man then. I don't know if i was because this happen from someone I trusted....because he lied.... or because I knew I would never see the money from him...over $600 of the original $1200 was because of things charged for him. Or I don't know if I started to cry, becausee I was going to have to do, what my mom, and my aunt told me to do, which was to report the card stolen, and if he gets locked up, as they told me, so be it.

Every since this has went down last night...I body, just seems so tired, and all I want to do, is sleep. So I'll keep you posted I guess.


fuzzy said...

my goodness! That is some ish! I will go with you when you use whatever credit I have! lol

Don't beat yourself up too bad over it. Look for his money. Afterall, he did say he had a advance check and he was going to pay you back from his paycheck as well! So let him pay you! If he doesn't have it, then take him to court for it! That will teach him!

Kat said...

Wow! I guess you live and you learn. It just SUCKS that this was family. I just can't understand it though. If it were me and someone agreed to HELP me by letting me use their credit card......before EACH swipe of that card I would be wondering if it was ABSOLUTEY Necessary. I would be SOOO worried that I was overstepping the generosity of that person. But it looks like your cousin could have cared less. That's just shocking to me.

I hope you get most or all of your money back. Whatever it takes to get it......that's what I'd do.

(Love your blog BTW)

RealHustla said...

I think you cried because you trusted your cousin who you were perfectly willing to help, but he abused your trust. That's painful. You probably thought that he respected you more all this time. After the tears flow you can get your head straight. Otherwise you might make some rash testosterone filled decision. I wouldn't be mad if you took your moms advice, otherwise he'll definitely be doing this kind of stuff again to someone else. I've eaten at these places and know you can't get a bill this high unless your paying for at least two other people and this is with dessert and drinks. Same thing with KFC.

I might not have to tell you this but I will anyway. Never let your credit card out of your hands again. If you want to help someone, give them cash or escort them to the purchase with the credit card.

Rahman said...

Man please don't beat yourself up over it that bad. You know what, it was a lesson learned. An expensive lesson but a lesson none the less. Obviously, you will still love him from afar and know that there is nothing that he could ever get from you again. It does hurt espically when it is family.

Anonymous said...

Learn from this.

Now let me cuss yo ass out. What the fuck were you thinking? Family will fuck you over just as much as a stranger. Never ever give anyone your credit card.

"Unless your last name is Hilton, Richie, or Olsen, I don't see how you can run up a credit card like this."....

I can. When it's not yours!

the old me said...

WTF! I would be crying too but it's time to wipe those tears and call 911 and report the card stolen and have your crazy greedy cousin arrested for being a damn fool.

I can almost (almost) understand him needing the money to get food and support if he was going through some rough times but damn, 85 at Outback is more than him and his girlfriend. And 60 is too much for one person that don't have money for they cell phone bill.

I can't stand men like this, always trying to front like they got it. And why he is buying meals for other people at BK and Mickey D's.

when you see him please slap him and give him a application for a second job so that he can pay you back.

Prince Xem VanAdams-Lumumba said...

Ive ALWAYS been told to NEVER Mix Money with Family or Friends. There have been times where I allowed my Emotions to OverPower My Logical Decisons, and CLEARLY Mixed the Three. Ive Learned that in 84% of the cases, Umm...You're NEVER going to see 'Borrowed' money from Family or Friends. Its Ridiculous, I Think...BUT...The Way of the World; it seems.

The AMAZING piece of this Story, However, is the FACT that your Heart allows you to continue to Help and Support a Family Member in his TIMES of Need; though it doesnt seem that he is too Appreciative, at all.

blkbutterfly said...

wow, is all i can say to this...

well, that and i hope by now you've cancelled the credit card or reported stolen because chances are, he'll max it out with more frivolous purchases.

i'd wait and see if he makes the first payment he promised and if not, i'd take him straight to court.

i hope everything works out for the better.

That Dude Right There said...

How in the hell do you even fix your mouth to ask someone to use their credit card???? I can understand borrowing money, but not a credit card.

That Dude Right There said...

How in the hell do you even fix your mouth to ask someone to use their credit card???? I can understand borrowing money, but not a credit card.

Q said...

The A.B.C. store is a necessity though. I hope you weren't mad about

bLaQ~n~MiLD said...

O HELL NAW! I learned a while ago not to mix money and friendship or family. You'll never see the money again no doubt.

There is another viable option that was not mentioned. I'd consult an attorney and see if you have grounds to sue him in small claims court. I don't know if you'll have a case due to the fact that you did give him the card but I would at least look into that option. But on the real, don't EVERY do that again yo. Definitely an expensive lesson learned ma brotha.


Anonymous said...

wow my real sister pulled that on me a few weeks ago. $100 for "small purchases" went into $1,600. the shock. so i'm feeling you with all this. "never again!" is what I say. damn family members.

Opinionated Diva said...

I knew something was up with you...your comments didn't have nearly as much off color humor!

Co-sign Southern...Learn from this!!!!

I don't think of you any differently for hurts when your family members do crappy things like this. You expect crap from strangers, but not those you love and especially not those you were trying to help!!!

What your cousin did was beyond low and I would DEFINITELY report that card stolen.

Corey Keith said...

Damn... I mean, damn...

Jersey Brotha said...

I feel your pain man. My aunt did some similar shit to me. It's a horrible feeling when you can't even trust your family. Hell, sometimes your family treats you worse than your damn enemies! And you're right, chances are you're never gonna see your money again.

Next time, I would suggest you get something in writing stating the person agrees to pay you back your money. That way, when/if the time comes for you to take him to court you have a better leg to stand on. Or shit, just plain say no. If the person doesn't have money to take their girlfriends out and such, that's not your problem. Oh well.

(And it doesn't make you less of a man when you cry. EVERYBODY cries.)

Anonymous said...

Damn... I've been making my way up through your blog, and this post really hurt my heart for you... like even more than yo mama slapping you twice. Family can do you dirtier than non-blood, and that dude know he foul. I feel for you in this situation, cause he mistook your kindness for weakness and took advantage of you. Stay strong brotha... I hope this turns out in your favor.